I think Rule #5 is clear. In the U.S. and probably everywhere else, except possibly Tibet, “Money equals Success!” So the objective for success is to get all the money you can. The problem is, you will probably come face-to-face with some moral dilemma sooner or later. That dilemma will be the moment of truth of your commitment to this rule for failure. If you are anything like most people you’ll probably have to learn through the “workshop of life.” That is, you’ll compromise (a little) of the right thing to do and go for the big pay off. Only to learn that the little compromise was your undoing.
The most recent examples of this situation are the admissions of Jason Giambi (New York Yankee baseball player) and Marion Jones (Olympic champion several times) use of steroids to enhance their performances. I would guess that the mental stress of knowing you cheated and trying to live with it is overwhelming. Which proves that there is something very deep within each of us that wants to be honest and truthful about ourselves. On the other hand, there are situations like Flyod Landis who claimed he did not use illegal performance-enhancing drugs to win the Tour de France, although the tests indicated he did; unlike the tests for Lance Armstrong.
The endorsement and notoriety payoffs in these situations are enormous. It’s all about the money and being set for life. Except for the fact that if there is the “slightest” doubt, then someone will go to the ends of the earth to expose You! If you don’t do it to yourself, he or she will. In the case of competition, there is always someone just as driven to win as well as collect the “gold” that comes with the win.
As Gordon Gekko (Michael Douglas) states in the movie Wall Street , “Greed is Good. Greed is right. Greed clarifies, cuts through, and captures the essence of the evolutionary spirit.” At some level within each of us, particularly in the U.S., this is the credo that equates to success. Until, of course, we experience the fate of Bud Fox in that same movie. He is arrested for insider trading and apparently learns his lesson. However, he still does the time. So keep in mind the lyrics, “Don’t do the crime, if you can’t do the time!
The point of this rule is, you have to define your own definition of success. Not those flaunted by the media, such as “Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous.” There are no famous people!!!! If you live your life full out with whatever you are good at. Then you are just as famous as anyone on this planet.. The only acknowledgement necessary is your own–which is commonly the most difficult one to get!
Write-in your stories of this rule so we can all learn more.
Bill
I once dated a man who originally chased me. The first month was great; we spent time together and really enjoyed each others company. But after that first month he came out of semi-retirement and went back to work. He stared five new companies, worked from dusk to dawn. I was kicked to the curb, I jokingly calling myself ‘number 2000’ on his list.
His drive for money and success took over his life. He is a successful man but has no relationship with family, the only people he allows himself to spend time with is people who are going to help him make more money.
It did not take me long to see through his looks and charm and realize that he was only using me as a bed warmer. Money may bring success and stability, but for me I would rather have true relationships like the ones I have with my children. The saying money can’t buy me love is really true.
Thanks for your story. Feel free to share anytime you choose without comment from me.
Bill
Bill,
Our company just landed a large account which is exciting. While we could handle the work ourselves, ZDocs believes in collaborating with a strategic partner to deliver a true turn-key solution. Simply speaking, we will provide millions in new revenue to this partner. When the CEO told his staff, that is when the complaining started by some of the middle managers. They were complaining that the margins were lower than normal and that it would bite into their profit sharing checks. The ironic point here is that without this new revenue, the middle managers would be getting a much smaller check because without this new account their company would not have any top-line growth. The result for me was a feeling of why I even bothered sharing the opportunity with my partners when I could have kept it all inside my own company had I not wanted to collaborate. This middle-management undercurrent caused me to seriously consider sharing future work with this partner. Luckily for the middle managers, the CEO was very appreciate that I shared the opportunity with his company.
We always have to remember that sometimes it’s not all about the money.
Until 2 years ago my goal was “making money”. I was working and I’ve earned money but I didn’t like my job. One year ago I became unemployed, the company I was working for, had to close. I was falling in a deep hole. Focussing on my age with no or very less possibility to get me a new job I didn’t know what to do.
Then: I was asked: how about doing what you really like to do? Wow – sounds good – but how to realize? That was the point my whole life turned upsite down.
Today I’m doing what I like to do, I’m spending my time with people I like to be with. Yes, I don’t have that much money than in my last years but I’m feeling lucky and satisfied. The way we all should feel in our day-by-day life. That’s what we are here for. And we can enjoy it with very little money. The things that really count – they are for free.
Money, “The root of all evil.”
We live in this society which socializes us to value money and achieving it as a way to validate the self. Now, I am speaking about my socialization world growing up, and if you came from a world where the love of doing something in itself was the top prize, regardless of the money situation, quite honestly, I admire that and am a little bit envious.
Growing up, I thought if I could have just enough money to raise a family and keep everyone happy, that is success. Although fleeting thoughts of “what I wanted to do in life-a passion” crept in at times, I often chose paths that money would follow.
Now, at the age of 40, reality has hit in like a ton of bricks. Sure money is important, yet it is not even close to everything. My relationship with my wife, Elizabeth and three boys, Michael 5, Matthew 3, and Cole 1 are the most prescious.
Recently, I discovered a revelation about myself. Whenever, I am desiring the need to be famous or achieve external rewards such as money, it occurs when I am not doing something of “passion” or something that is alligned with my values.
In November, I completed the Philadelphia Marathon. After training for 6 months, and experiencing the pain, sweat, and tears of the process…an elation came over me of joy and peace. This feeling is what is important…as this goal was alligned with my values. My lesson: One of the best experiences in my life, had nothing to do with money. Secondly, it was one of the most difficult challenges and successes in my life.
As we move forward in to 2008, my goal is to really uncover the layers of the onions to my true work passions and continue pursuing them and that it works for the fabulous four.
Happy Holidays to all, thanks for listening.